B E N J A M I N      F R I E D L A N D E R
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SEVEN POEMS

 

 

Biological or Social Female Parent of a Child or Offspring and Its Poetry

 

Mom, I just want to say thanks
for everythin u have done.

Kangaroo poo eaten by a kitten
made you into a “back-up” turkey,

in case my bird flopped. Mom,
you are simply red-

faced professor made up scary story
about moms and their poo

which, in consequence of Section 3
of this Agreement, the turkey baster

can eliminate Eve's curse with a flush—
and now there's nothing new to eat!

Way to go, mom! To me, the idea
of wearing “I'm not afraid” t-shirts to restrict

your intake of fluids
during labor, well, that's not poetry,

the ultimate woodchipper,
sometimes referred to as “cutting teeth.” Long before John

Ashbery was even conceived, his mom
was unemployed and lived with his mom

creating suction
stained dark,

greenish brown. Tupac's mom
waved a rally flag

at A's games. After not
having her abortion she created a blog about bugs

from his ashes, like Mother Teresa.
And then there's George Washington's mom,

the most beautiful woman I ever saw.
We took a sample from her hair to analyze

for mitochondrial DNA. It was pure poetry.
She should get some teeth taken out to improve

her smile. She's awesome!
Yes, she's a major pain,

but moms mean well. How do we know?
Because of mom.

 

 

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